Estoy agradecida.

I was blessed to be able to be with friends and family for Thanksgiving this year. It was the type of thanksgiving where everyone was invited and then brought their turkeys along with. It makes for a home brimming with life... and turkey. But no one minded, and we just got to eat that much more turkey!

 Ezra Elizabeth turned One on Thanksgiving Day. She is full of kisses, tasty "mmmm's" and smiles. She loves doggies and kitties, but only at safe distances. There's no one she is not willing to love... eyebrows and all! :) Made Thanksgiving that much sweeter to get to love on this little sweet pea a little.

Pie for Thanksgiving.

I got to be with the Viens for Thanksgiving this year. I was looking forward to it. Since Bekah moved out over a year ago I have not stayed there as much as I did when first moving out East. It kind of gave me a feeling of "Home for the Holidays" to get to return after many months. It was also really fun to leave work Wednesday night and tell everyone "Happy Thanksgiving" as I skipped out the door. When you have no change in your work schedule it seems an almost futile sentiment, but with plans for the holiday you can really sense and share the excitement.

So for the next three years at least, I'm sure to be working on Thanksgiving. That being said, I did my best to eat enough turkey this year to last.
Blessings everyone,
Much Love.

Estoy siendo refinada con fuego.

Wood firing of the Kiln at Muddy Brook Potters! November 19, 2016.
Daniel 3: 9-29 

  They spake and said to the king Nebuchadnezzar, O king, live for ever.
¹⁰ Thou, O king, hast made a decree, that every man that shall hear the sound of the cornet, flute, harp, sackbut, psaltery, and dulcimer, and all kinds of musick, shall fall down and worship the golden image:
¹¹ And whoso falleth not down and worshippeth, that he should be cast into the midst of a burning fiery furnace.

 ¹² There are certain Jews whom thou hast set over the affairs of the province of Babylon, Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego; these men, O king, have not regarded thee: they serve not thy gods, nor worship the golden image which thou hast set up.

 ¹³ Then Nebuchadnezzar in his rage and fury commanded to bring Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego. Then they brought these men before the king.
¹⁴ Nebuchadnezzar spake and said unto them, Is it true, O Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego, do not ye serve my gods, nor worship the golden image which I have set up?
¹⁵ Now if ye be ready that at what time ye hear the sound of the cornet, flute, harp, sackbut, psaltery, and dulcimer, and all kinds of musick, ye fall down and worship the image which I have made; well: but if ye worship not, ye shall be cast the same hour into the midst of a burning fiery furnace; and who is that God that shall deliver you out of my hands?

¹⁶ Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego, answered and said to the king, O Nebuchadnezzar, we are not careful to answer thee in this matter.
¹⁷ If it be so, our God whom we serve is able to deliver us from the burning fiery furnace, and he will deliver us out of thine hand, O king.
¹⁸ But if not, be it known unto thee, O king, that we will not serve thy gods, nor worship the golden image which thou hast set up.

¹⁹ Then was Nebuchadnezzar full of fury, and the form of his visage was changed against Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego: therefore he spake, and commanded that they should heat the furnace one seven times more than it was wont to be heated.
²⁰ And he commanded the most mighty men that were in his army to bind Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego, and to cast them into the burning fiery furnace.
²¹ Then these men were bound in their coats, their hosen, and their hats, and their other garments, and were cast into the midst of the burning fiery furnace.

 ²² Therefore because the king's commandment was urgent, and the furnace exceeding hot, the flames of the fire slew those men that took up Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego.

 ²³ And these three men, Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego, fell down bound into the midst of the burning fiery furnace.

 ²⁴ Then Nebuchadnezzar the king was astonished, and rose up in haste, and spake, and said unto his counsellors, Did not we cast three men bound into the midst of the fire? They answered and said unto the king, True, O king.

 ²⁵ He answered and said, Lo, I see four men loose, walking in the midst of the fire, and they have no hurt; and the form of the fourth is like the Son of God.

²⁶ Then Nebuchadnezzar came near to the mouth of the burning fiery furnace, and spake, and said, Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego, ye servants of the most high God, come forth, and come hither. Then Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego, came forth of the midst of the fire.
²⁷ And the princes, governors, and captains, and the king's counsellors, being gathered together, saw these men, upon whose bodies the fire had no power, nor was an hair of their head singed, neither were their coats changed, nor the smell of fire had passed on them.

²⁸ Then Nebuchadnezzar spake, and said, Blessed be the God of Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego, who hath sent his angel, and delivered his servants that trusted in him, and have changed the king's word, and yielded their bodies, that they might not serve nor worship any god, except their own God.
²⁹ Therefore I make a decree, That every people, nation, and language, which speak any thing amiss against the God of Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego, shall be cut in pieces, and their houses shall be made a dunghill: because there is no other God that can deliver after this sort.

Much Love.

Estoy separando emociones.

After weeks of agonizing waiting...

I turned the corner with my Attending, our patient's father sees us from the door way and joyfully greats us with, "She's pooping!" We don't say anything at first, almost too scared to believe it to be true! But he keeps repeating it, louder each time, completely oblivious to the other inhabitants of the unit. Mom joins in, laughing more than actually saying anything. She keeps going back and forth between the bathroom door and the room door to make sure we keep coming. Our patient, inside the bathroom, exclaiming to her mom to close the door, she's not done yet!  And little brother, not sure what's going on, but aware enough to realize whatever it is, is very. Very. Exciting! We get to the door and Dad hugs me... he squeezes me so hard. His little girl is pooping! And I couldn't help it. My eyes got wet all on their own. Welled right up! My patient pooped and I cried.

A few days later, she got to go home, and that night I had a nightmare. I dreamt that she came back to the hospital. I dreamt that she was admitted under General Pediatrics and a large collection in her abdomen was drained by Interventional Radiology. The worst part of my nightmare, was that we hadn't known she was there. Not until the next day at work, a pediatric resident, stops me in the hallway to ask about her history. My eyes still get big and my heart rate goes up just thinking about it. First: our patient having to come back. And Second: her not coming back to us.

You wake up from a nightmare like that and immediately start praying, "Please, let that just be a nightmare." "Please, let her be okay."

Much Love.

Estoy leyendo.

One of our Pediatric Surgery Attendings at the hospital is the Clinton's neighbor. I've been assisting him in the OR the past couple of days. It's interesting to hear someone talk about our recent election from the viewpoint of a neighbor. You don't sound more normal than to be called someone's neighbor. When you think of arguably the most powerful position on this Earth, you don't typically think of that position as being held by someone's neighbor.

A couple of recent photos:

 We had our first W.O.W. event of the year. Not everyone was able to make it as presentations were being prepared and traumas came in just at the change of shift, etc. But those who could attended, and we missed those who couldn't.

 I missed the couch on our first attempt at a group photo.

 

 Women Of Westchester (some of them)

 

 My Mom and Dad flew out to visit me last month. They spent a couple of days hanging out and spoiling me. They bought me candy. Made use of the hotel hot tub (see below). And played trivial pursuit until I would fall asleep mid-question. I let my team at the hospital know, and they were real cool with covering at the end of the day to let me leave at 6pm so I'd have as much time as possible to spend with them. It was just two days, but it was pretty cool of them to come see me! Love you Mom & Dad.

Much Love.

Estoy tratando ayudar.

I was on call this past Saturday. It's always a rough time, sometimes worse than others. It didn't help this time that one of my co-interns called his chief at 04:30 am in hysterics. He was about to break, no longer trusted himself with the care of any patient, grabbed his bag and left. It left the rest of us to scramble to cover all of his patients. It's all about prioritizing, and just never stopping.

The weekend passed. Those who needed it took a moment to breathe. I know that I left the hospital Saturday night, wanting to go home and sleep, but drove to CT instead. I just really needed to be with my people on Sunday.  And we all came back today for another day, another week.

In between taking care of my kids I go over to the main hospital and check-in with my co-intern. Get through some pending paperwork for a patient's discharge, whatever he needs. And really just to make sure his head is still attached and he's aware of his feet still under him. It's going to be one day at a time for a little while here.

Watching someone go through these struggles, really renews my caution at encouraging any student towards surgery. It's not fun to watch someone panicking and question their entire life's choices and ability to even continue on. And especially this year, because we did loose an intern last year, I don't want it to become a trend.

Much Love.

Estoy despertando cada mañana como nuevo.

Two individuals. Two surgeries. Two teams. One place. One time. 

My chief assisted one Attending, while standing across the table looking in the opposite direction yet with the exact same view, I stood assisting another Attending. We started the surgery off. We were just the beginning of a day long surgery to separate a pair of twins conjoined at the hip. My Attending and I worked on Blue Baby while at the exact same time my chief worked on Pink Baby. Probably the second time laparoscopic surgery was completed simultaneously on a pair of conjoined twins in the history of the world. The babies took it like a champ... or champs! ;) 

At one point of the surgery my Attending looks up from Blue baby and mentions. "You know... we went through residency, through fellowship, and as an Attending had to work to get here. What did you guys do? You just woke up this morning." 

His point being, that we are two incredibly blessed residents to be in the right rotation at the right time to have an opportunity like this simply handed to us, but there's actually a lot to be said for that. 

There's a lot to be said for simply waking up in the morning. Because once you wake up, you can then choose to get up, and then, to move forward. And who knows what the new day holds for you? If we don't get up in the morning, we'll never find out.

Isaiah 43:19 Behold, I will do a new thing; now it shall spring forth; shall he not know it? I will even make a way in the wilderness, and rivers in the desert. 

My heart is so full right now! There are times when I get to my car at night and take off for home and finally release which ever emotion I've been tamponading all day. Most often it's a cheer, a shot of joy at something new I got to do, or a beautiful surgery I got to witness. Today, "a cheer" didn't come close to covering it. 

Can't wait to wake up tomorrow morning!

Much Love.

Estoy jugando con niños.

Halloween randomly found me making my way home the roundabout way. The dark of night and winding my way through Sleepy Hollow.  The town does well to live up to the story bestowed on it by its name.

Started Pediatric Surgery today. My first time to ever rotate through this service. I have just spent the past four months over in the main hospital with the majority of my time on the surgical floor. I am so welcoming the break and the chance to do something different for a short while. Looking forward to learning something new!

Started off the day pulling a tooth out of a kid's lung. (His younger brother had kicked him in the mouth.) Finished with an appendicitis. Taking care of consults, traumas and the floors in between the two. All-in-all not bad for my first day on Peds.

Tomorrow is a scheduled separation of conjoined twins. Good month to be on Peds Surgery!

Much Love.