Estoy jugando juegos.

The Dean of Graduate Medical Education at WMC requested a meeting with us residents the other day. He presented himself as a friend and the meeting as a way for him to understand the current issues at hand from a surgical perspective (pediatric cardiologist himself). That's all well and good, I can appreciate his efforts. But he asked who we would turn to for advice, and without hesitation, general consensus was , 'our co-residents'.

The other day my patient flipped me the bird, and I took it as the best sign I could possibly get from her. I left her room laughing and encouraged. My co-residents would understand.

The other night, I was finally about to head home when a message was sent out to the resident group text that a procurement was happening, and without thinking twice I responded "I'll go," securing my spot in the transport and across the table from my Attending at the harvest. I knew it would mean no sleep that night and forfeiting the one opportunity I would have had in weeks to get a full nights rest. It was worth it. My co-residents would understand.

As medicine has so drastically changed over the years, our Attendings can't even really relate to how various constraints, such as work hour limitations and emr requirements, impact our education, our responsibilities and our division of time. We understand that, and respect that.

Therefore dear dean we responded as such. We want to be taught to operate. We want to take care of our patients. But with the limitations and requirements of the medical infrastructure in place today, we often feel like the system is working against us. And, well, my co-residents understand that.

Meeting of the minds in the trauma bay. Vasu, Shekhar, Adi, Ansab

Social Events: The saddest thing is that there can never, ever be a social event where everyone can come. We cover the hospital 24/7/365. So we join when able or wait for the next time. 

Game Night! Hanjoo, Faisal, Muhammad, Monica, Agon, Alex, Michelle, James

 Chinese bbq and dumplings at Niu's! Asad, Jacob, James, Adi, Alex

Chinese bbq and dumplings at Niu's! Kevin (Niu's son), me, Ansab, Jacob, Asad, Alex

We make surgery residency look easy!! :)

Much Love.

Estoy visitando mi amiga.

'Why?' continues to be the question of the month. Not that I've ever had a question of the month before, or will ever again. This time, it had nothing to do with work, but rather with subjects so much more important. Life, Love & Loss.
A door opened for a moment, and I am so thankful I saw it. I bought a last minute ticket to Texas and flew down to visit a friend this past weekend. The Sibaja family accepted me as a sister and daughter while I was in Mexico. Issa was visiting her sister Areli Reutter so I flew down to surprise her! She was surprised! Here's a couple pictures from the trip.

Monopoly

An AC family if ever I saw one! :) Issa's nephews.

Stroll through the park,

And by the river.

Tennis

Splash Pad. Issa's nephews.

Issa & I

Issa, I & Areli

Short but sweet, and I was on my way back to NY.

To say that I went on a trip down memory lane this past weekend, and then again putting this post up is a drastic understatement. God used his people in Mexico to help mold me into the person he then saw fit to sent to NY. They are forever part of me.

 L to R: Andrea, Nayeli, Lupita, Issa, Marce, Claudia, Me, Belen, Laura, Maggie, Ana

 Issa, Lupita, me

 Me, Lupita, Issa

 Lupita, Jessia, Elsa, Me, Issa

 :)

 Issa & I

Issa & I

Much Love.

Estoy estudiando.

The other day I took my cardboard/paper recyclables down to the recycle bin in the basement of my building. I was rewarded with a satisfactory feeling of accomplishment. So satisfactory the feeling was, that it lasted the whole day. I had successfully completed just one small mundane act and whew!.... was flying high! Could have happily slept the rest of the day, but don’t worry, I got my studying for the day done as well.

Speaking of studying, I expressed to one of my attendings the other day my concern for our ability as surgery residents to be able to afford the time to study adequately in order to boost our ABSITE scores. The general goal of any surgery program, includes to some varying level (depending on the program) preparing its residents to take the boards upon graduation. The yearly ABSITE helps gauge how well the residents are doing, a.k.a. how well the program is teaching its residents. New study methods or education techniques are implemented each year towards this effort.  This year however, research requirements have been implemented. Research is necessary in medicine.  Many programs have an entire year built in during which a specific resident will do nothing but research. We are not currently that type of program, therefore research is added on top of what we already have asked of us. Can we do it? Yes, of course we can. However, it will unfortunately come at the cost of what scarce study time we had. And hence, my concern for our ability to improve our ABSITE scores this year. 

Maybe this all leads to my inflated feeling of accomplishment for something as simple as taking out the recyclables. With a ‘To Do’ list that is seemingly never-ending, it is something that I can check off with a job well done. Never underestimate the value of small attainable goals.

Much Love.

Estoy enfocando dentro de mi.

I have been having multiple conversations recently on the topic of the choice of surgery. Expected conversation with medical students.  In a way, that is not only expected, but encouraged as they are typically watching everything we as residents do and subconsciously asking themselves... could I do that or would I like to do that one day? As they near the time to make the decision for themselves, whether radiology, psychiatry or surgery, I encourage them to first answer their own why.

But it’s not just the medical students, a handful of my co-residents have been struggling as well. Sometimes, our whys will change, and that’s okay. It’s allowed. Sometimes we have multiple whys, which is also okay. There are no rules. But when we don’t identify the change or simply lose focus of who we are and then hard times hit, it is just that much harder to hold on without our feet firmly planted. Do residents talk about giving up? Of course. But that’s why we have each other. We’ll get through this together. I’m thankful that for the most part, our family of residents are open with struggles and accepting of any needed encouragement and/or pep talk. I know none of us actually want to quit, they just need reminding of that fact from time to time.

When love, hope and peace seem to be in shorter supply... I know it’s time for a vacation again. Need that reminder that people in general are good and caring, and that the world holds so much more than this small corner, and one day I will be able to help.
I like to look at my medical students and pray that each one goes on to achieve great things. Knowing that by helping them, I will then some day be able to have remotely helped the world through them as well.

Much Love.

Estoy tomando un descanso.

We work hard at work.

Don't let the pictures deceive you! ;)
Much Love!