Every medical student, at some point during medical school, comes to a realization that by looking at everything backwards they are learning a million and one ways to kill someone. If you know how something can kill, then you can figure out how to reverse it, prevent it and/or just plain stop it.
But that's over-rated, you don't need to go to medical school. Any Joe Schmoe can grab the nearest kitchen knife and go digging for his carotid.
He said that was his goal, the carotid, although he pronounced it with the accent on the wrong syllable. I guess he had tried multiple times and then fallen asleep. I don't know what changed during that sleep, but when he woke up, still alive, he let his brother bring him to the hospital.
Suspicion was low for severe damage, but due to the close proximity of numerous vital structures a CT angiography of the neck was obtained. As I set up to repair the wound he asked me how close he was. He asked with such intensity, and I couldn't interpret his motive for wanting to know. When I tried to brush off the question, he asked again with even greater intensity.
Was he looking for how to do a better job next time? Or was he realizing with relief that he now had a second chance.
No matter what his motive for the question, I have two messages for him.
1) You are blessed.
2) There is hope.
Much Love.
"You are closer than this breath that I take"
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