This particular lesson involves a case in the operating room. It was a difficult case, there was a lot of badness going on and we were doing our best to stay out of trouble. At one point, my Attending suggested one option that he wanted; to which I immediately responded in polite contradiction. For whatever reason, my Attending allowed me to win the decision and we finished the case. Come Monday our poor patient was not doing well. After work up we were able to determine the reason. My Attending came to me and in a backwards sort of way thanked me for that decision. It was the one thing that probably saved our patient from crashing over the weekend. And I realized for the first time, that I have learned something over the past two years. With the shear amount of surgery I have yet to learn and understand it's easy to forget that it's not impossible.
One of factors of the above example that tells me I have learned something is the fact that I was able to say something. I'm not unaware of the fact that it takes me so much longer to learn something than my colleagues. I have to go over it again, and again. And if asked to give a response orally I still probably couldn't respond. So I have to go over it yet again and again. So, the fact that in the moment and under stress I was able to make a decision AND verbalize my opinion. For the first time ever I feel that maybe I have learned something. It's only one tiny little thing, but it holds such encouraging significance to me!
Much Love.
No comments:
Post a Comment