Yo estoy trabajando.

My officemate asked me why I'm so smiley lately.  I responded I didn't think of myself as any more different than normal.  His response: "No you are.  You were sad two weeks ago."  I played it off, denied it.  But honestly, I can tell you exactly what he was referring to.

I was feeling incredibly pointless two weeks ago.
Project 1: We're waiting to hear if it's accepted.  So nothing to do at the moment.
Project 2: We're waiting for the IRB to be approved so we can expand the patient search and complete the data extraction.
Project 3: I'm waiting, been waiting, will probably continue to wait for my access to the specific program to be granted so I can actually analyze the data that is sitting in the office on CDs.  Soooooooo frustrating this bureaucratic red tape.  The work is right there in front of me and I can't touch it.
Project 4: We're waiting for organization.  It's over 100 years of data to comb through.  Just how is this going to be accomplished?
Project 5: So this was technically the only project that I could accomplish anything on.  However this is the vaguest of all the projects.  I've been working on this since June.  Will probably be working on it until I leave, whenever that is.  But if anything ever results of this research in matters of publication or benefiting the medical community, it will at minimum be at least a year from now if not more.  Most likely when I'm gone.  And all of this work I've done will be handed off to someone else, revised and then another name put on it. So......I was asking myself, just why exactly am I spending time and effort on this?

I reiterate. I was feeling incredibly pointless.  My work was not proving to be productive.  No one was being helped. There was just no clear reason, why or purpose.  And feeling as such, Colossians 3:23 was just not coming easily.  And this.  This was making me sad.


I know Jesus is reason, why and purpose enough to work heartily no matter how productive or helpful the work is.  I knew this, and really gave myself the daily pep talk, but I still struggled.  We all struggle sometimes.
So the next time the work isn't as productive, maybe that's when our 'Good morning' to someone in the hallway, or a smile to a coworker is the most important.  When we need to remember that our work which doesn't leave a papertrail is more important than the work that does.

 Hasta!

Colossians 3:23 And whatsoever ye do, do it heartily, as to the Lord, and not unto men;